Feb. 3's Super Bowl XLII is set to be yet another in a series of mega television events of great sociological import--a tribal thing. A bonding experience. (I'm not even sure we're allowed to refer to the event as "Super Bowl XLII" without some kind of mega-dollar marketing agreement with the NFL in our back pocket--Ed.)
    No matter what you call the event, though, many Americans will have a Super Sunday that day sitting in their recliners and couches drinking "lite" beer (puke!) and wolfing down bowl after bowl of microwaved Cajun-fried chili nacho pretzel dog pizza wing eggroll nuggets dipped in creamy ranch dressing. I imagine they'll manage to pack another 7 holiday pounds into their loose-fitting sweat pants before the first quarter of the game comes to an end.   
    Instead of following along like a good little flock member, I'm going to exercise my non-conformist muscle a little and tune the 42-inch LCD to the DIY Network instead. My plan is to watch a good chunk of  the 11-hour "Toilet Bowl Marathon" from noon to 11 p.m.    
    I can hear you gasping in disbelief. Not watching the Big Game? Well, that's downright un-American, huh? But follow my perfect linear logic here.
    I could spend six or so hours stuffing my face with lousy cholesterol-laden food-like substances and washing it down with watery, tasteless beer-ish fluids while watching 22 sweaty guys grab around on each other and grunt and groan and do lord knows what all else to each other in those big, writhing piles of spandex-clad bodies that each play ends up with.
    Not that there's anything wrong with that.
    Or I could mention that Amy Matthews is set to host the 11 new episodes of DIY Network's' tangentially work-related "Bathroom Renovations" program that are going to air as part of the "Toilet Bowl Marathon."
    I'll be a better editor for it, I know, and that's a Super Sunday in anyone's book. 

DIY Network host Amy Matthews is much better, IMHO, than a pile of sweaty guys.